Now, I may be expressing an unpopular point of view, but many people actually overestimate the importance of friendship. And, accordingly, this friendship is sometimes overused. No, of course, it’s always great to have someone nearby who will open your eyes to how things really are. But what if this frank and straightforward person is also mistaken?
So here’s another similar story from the user u/FancyConstruction812, whose friend also tried to ‘open her eyes’ to the incompatibility of a baby and cats in the house, and when that didn’t work, she started badmouthing her, thereby only proving her own entitlement.
The author of the post is an expecting mom and she also has 4 cats at home
Image credits: Chewy (not the actual photo)
When the author’s friend found out she’s pregnant, she literally demanded the author get rid of all her cats
Image credits: u/FancyConstruction812
However, the author calmly told her that the cats aren’t disposable, and she’ll keep them all
Image credits: EKATERINA BOLOVTSOVA (not the actual photo)
Image credits: FancyConstruction812
So the friend berated the mom-to-be, and then started badmouthing her at work behind her back
So, meet the Original Poster (OP) – a 30-year-old woman, a happy expectant mother and at the same time the owner of four cats (all rescues), which she and her partner got during their ten-year relationship together.
And the author of the post also has a friend at work named Josie, who at one point asked her a not entirely clear question – where does the OP plan to put her cats in light of the upcoming birth of a child? The original poster was very surprised and gave an absolutely logical answer that she was not going to do anything with the cats – as they have lived in the house, they would continue to live there.
As it turned out, with this answer the OP only opened the tap of Josie’s eloquence, as she immediately bombarded the mom-to-be with a bunch of facts and stories about toxoplasmosis, allergies and how dangerous it actually is for a newborn simply to have a cat nearby. In other words, according to her friend, a cat is a red flag for any mom, and four cats is absolutely terrifying…
To the OP’s credit, she did not panic and calmly said that she grew up in a house with cats, and didn’t get toxoplasmosis, and neither she nor the child’s father had any allergies. As for, for example, cleaning the litter box in the later months of pregnancy, she may well ask her partner about it, and he will willingly fulfill this request. Well, various urban legends are nothing more than legends… In general, as the author summarized, the cats will stay, and this is not to be discussed any further.
After that, Josie directly called her friend ‘a [sh**] mother’, putting her tailed pets above the health of the tot, and then completely began badmouthing her at work, promoting the same thesis among the colleagues. In general, now almost the entire office is close to unanimously condemning the OP for being ‘selfish’, and Josie, apparently, has come close to the ‘ex-friend’ status…
Image credits: AgusUser (not the actual photo)
Well, I analyzed several dozen sources (alas, I can’t analyze my own experience, since I’m a dog-lover myself), and in none of them did I see a direct recommendation like: “if you are pregnant, urgently start giving away your cats to friends!” No, of course, you need to take various precautions and carefully approach the very process of introducing the baby to your kitties – but nothing more.
“Fortunately, cats and babies can live together happily, but it will take some family preparation to make sure everything goes smoothly,” writes Amy Flowers, DVM, in her article on baby-cat coexistence on the WebMD website. In other words, if you gradually prepare the cats for the upcoming addition to the family, then, most likely, everything will go absolutely seamlessly.
And, of course, you should limit the cats’ access to the street – in order to avoid the danger of toxoplasmosis – and in addition, during the pregnancy and at least in the first years of the baby’s life, you had better not bring new cats into the house, either. Well, of course, you should double your attention (in the OP’s case, apparently, quadruple your attention), but careful adherence to the recommendations of experts (and it’s worth visiting doctors for sure!) will generally help to avoid many possible problems.
Of course, the vast majority of people in the comments to the original post massively supported the author, giving her a shout-out for her strong belief that cats and pets in general are not disposable, but full-fledged members of the family. Yes, there is a risk of toxoplasmosis and other diseases, but everything can be solved by observing fairly basic principles of hygiene, the folks in the comments are pretty much convinced.
As for the OP’s hapless ‘friend,’ the commenters seriously urge the author to think about the prospects for further communication with such a person. Some, given the insults that the mom-to-be suffered from Josie, generally recommend reporting her to HR. “Get rid of her, keep the cats,” is perhaps the ideal slogan for the general vox populi. So do you, our dear readers, agree with this slogan?
People in the comments unanimously praised the author for her decision, and some folks even recommended to report the ‘friend’ to HR
Image credits: Nikita Nikitin (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Jonas Vincent (not the actual photo)
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