We’re constantly bombarded by messages that we should seize the day, live life to the fullest, and that we can do and be absolutely anything that we want. It’s either empowering or emotionally exhausting depending on your point of view. One of the problems that lie at the core of this ‘go-gettism’ philosophy is that there often isn’t much guidance behind the energetic urging to not waste a single moment more and embrace an adrenaline-filled, happy-go-lucky lifestyle.

That means that it’s up to every single person to try and figure out what they really want to do, whether it’s professionally or during their spare time. And that can lead to some very naive mistakes. Maybe you realized that bungee jumping really isn’t for you. Perhaps you learned the hard way that camping isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be if you don’t have a tiny Aragorn living inside your heart. Or maybe you got burned after trusting your colleagues too much.

Reddit users opened up about their worst experiences and mistakes in a brutally honest thread full of worldly wisdom. Scroll down for the anti-bucket list of things that people will never ever do again.

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#1

Work in a covid unit. It was worth it in the beginning when I felt like I was trying to rescue victims of an unknown enemy while risking my life to buy precious time for a game-changing miracle. However, parts of me have died over the last two years. The patients that come into my ER now days have turned up their noses at a vaccine that many have died in my presence waiting for. The ones dying of covid are shouting at me, hitting me, threatening me, and trying to pull the PPE off of my face because they don't think that covid is real. I've had to drive past protesters on my way home from a shift where I had to take an eight year old off of life support because her unvaccinated parents gave the virus to her. I don't even feel sad anymore when a patient passes because now I have a ventilator open for at least one of the next three patients circling the drain. I'm tired of getting yelled at by antivaxers and their families. I'm tired of risking my life for people who won't do the bare minimum, like taking a jab, to live. I've spent my life trying to help people, but no one is worth it anymore. You win. I'm done. I regret it all. Everything I ever stood for is dead. The only thing that matters to me is my dog. She will never understand why I never came home, but she has widespread cancer, so that won't be long either.

#2

Facebook. Deleted the account, never going back. I don’t miss it at all.

#3

Vote Republican. I was a lifelong R until they picked Trump. My eyes were opened to what they were and I'll never donate another cent or vote R for any position ever again. I love when I get the calls from them, begging for money. I get to explain why the money they used to get is now going to their opponents.

The anti-bucket list is the complete opposite of the bucket list, a list of all the things that a person hopes to do in life.

They say that the best teacher is cold, hard experience. And there’s no denying that trying out a whole bunch of different activities can quickly help you filter out what you actually enjoy doing and what sounds great on paper but is horrible in real life.

However, things aren’t so easy when you deal with underlying assumptions like trusting everyone, not just leisure activities. If the fundamental ideas that make up your life get shaken, you can be in for a rude awakening. And with a lot to think about while you’re sitting there, angry, ashamed, embarrassed.

#4

Buy clothes that don’t fit well in hopes that “someday” I’ll lose weight and be comfortable in them. Just size up, [darn] it, and be comfortable now!

#5

Settling for a relationship knowing you are not really happy. Never. Again.

#6

Give a f*** about other people’s opinions of me. Not my business.

Something that we all have to remind ourselves of from time to time is that it’s all right to make mistakes. Nobody’s perfect. And, heck, you could argue that perfection is overrated. What really matters is learning to embrace the mistakes that we make and learning the lessons that are there to be learned, without regret.

Vanessa Bohns, an Associate Professor of Organizational Behavior at Cornell University, explained to us earlier about embracing mistakes, dealing with our embarrassment, and why hiding our mistakes isn’t healthy for us.

"We spend a lot of time and effort presenting an ideal version of ourselves to other people. When something happens that contrasts with the image we’ve been projecting—when we say or do something that shows we actually aren’t as graceful or as smart as we’d like people to believe—we feel embarrassed," Vanessa told Bored Panda during an earlier interview that many of us want to seem perfect.

#7

Now I always pee before cutting jalapeno peppers. The other way around, never again.

#8

Assume that every co worker is a friend. I truly believed most of my colleagues were friends in a place I used too work, to the point I’d go above and beyond to help them. Even if it was rarely if ever reciprocated. Yet whenever I needed help they were nowhere to be found or were ‘busy’. If I got in trouble they were quick to throw me under the bus without hesitation and would lie to my face about doing so.

#9

I refuse to ever do retail again, people are literally such a**holes and don’t realize your trying to help them and still get their job done.

"Discovering you were wrong about something most everyone else around you has long known to be true is one of those moments. In that moment we learn, 'Wait a minute, maybe I haven’t been presenting the image of being smart or worldly that I thought I was presenting all this time,' which is embarrassing,” she explained how embarrassment works.

“One thing that’s interesting about embarrassment is that, for as much as we might experience it as painful in the moment, it’s actually very socially adaptive. Being embarrassed signals to other people that you care about what they think. And that actually draws people in to you,” the expert pointed out that when we admit to our mistakes openly, we become better liked.

#10

Smoke. Did it for 14 years. I feel so much better having quit. Been about 10 years since and the amount of money saved and the smell and the cough.

#11

Having [intimacy] without wanting to. I was in a relationship with someone who'd frequently pressure me into having [intimacy], and I'm definitely never ever doing that again.

#12

Work as a bartender. I know, I know, the money is good. But getting home at 4am or later, the booze and drug scene, surviving on Red Bull and pedialyte, and getting grabassed by strangers while trying to pay my bills is not the life for me. 787 days sober and I’ll never look back. Got my degree and working as a design specialist/content developer for a museum now and I LOVE MY JOB. Also started my own small business and it’s going really well so far. I have an art show coming up soon and I’m really excited for it.

“So blushing, burying your head in your hands, laughing, acknowledging how embarrassing something was, are all totally healthy ways to react.”

On the flip side, when we try to hide our mistakes and embarrassment, we’re shooting ourselves in the foot, socially speaking. In other words, it’s not only cathartic, it’s also socially useful for us to admit to the times we utterly embarrassed ourselves or messed up beyond all belief.

#13

Stay at a job I’m unhappy at.

#14

Trying to be liked by everybody by always being nice and never saying no. Never again.

#15

Camping. Never again will I leave my perfectly comfortable house for a weekend to sleep on the ground and share a disgusting bathroom with 150 strangers.

“The unhealthy way to react is to pretend you’re not embarrassed, that you didn’t make a mistake, or to get angry. Those things undo the positive effect of embarrassment typically has on other people by conveying insincerity and pushing people away rather than drawing them in,” Vanessa said.

#16

Loan a friend money with the expectation of getting it back. Haven’t loaned money since and if I ever do, it’s a gift.

#17

Being obese. I didn’t realize how much it negatively affected everything in my life until I lost 80 pounds. Then I was like “oh THIS is how I’m supposed to feel.”

#18

Go to Disneyland or Disney World. Paid waaaaay too much money to stand in waaaay too many lines, fighting crowds of waaaay too many people. Disney parks are not a fun way to spend a day.

#19

Keep putting everyone else’s needs over my own.

#20

Forgive a cheater.

#21

Bungee jump.. as soon as my feet left the edge all I could think was "well that was stupid"... It was exciting and probably safe enough.. but it was enough for me to know I will never willingly do that again.

#22

Allow my mood to get tethered to someone else's. With my ex, I was only ever happy when she was happy and if she woke up in a bad mood, my day was ruined. I need to live my own life without clinging onto someone else's.

#23

Working in academia - left two years ago and never looking back. f*** that noise. Soon as the business folk became in charge of the institution instead of the professors, it was all over. Changing the model from " how can we best teach and research knowledge" to "how can we make more money to expand" destroyed the core philosophy.

#24

Have a relationship with someone with children, thus finding myself in the stepfamily situation with never fully feeling accepted, the ex being omnipresent, and always being the one to adjust because… those poor children. And it’s true: they cannot help their situation. But I aint doing it ever again.

#25

Pulling an all nighter. Age is catching up on me.

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