The charm of the world around us is that it’s totally unpredictable. It puts us into the most unlikely, annoying, and challenging scenarios where we have to find our way through. And while some believe in luck, or lack thereof, others like to take matters into their own hands and use some pragmatic strategies. Like, psychological tricks.
And it turns out, most people have one ready when a particular situation strikes. From answering to “Why’s” in such a way that you redirect the question back to avoiding office small-talk so that nobody thinks you’re rude, to making yourself look like less of a self-obsessed jerk simply by replacing “I know” with “You’re right,” these are some of the biggest psychological tricks.
Shared in the comment section for the question “What is the most effective psychological 'trick' you use?” on r/AskReddit, some people seem to really know how to nail the mental game big time.
#1
My 4-year-old got into the 'Why?' phase a little while back. I read an article that said the best way to get them to stop was to ask them, 'I'm not sure, what do you think?' It is a godsend. They answer their own question, you provide some feedback, and they immediately move on. [Freaking] awesome.
Image credits: AD_Meridian
#2
To avoid workplace drama and be liked, compliment people behind their back.
Image credits: Unknown
#3
When I do something bothersome to my husband and he goes quiet, I wait a few minutes and then ask him a seemingly innocent question, usually on the subject of how certain parts of a car works. This gets him talking about the car thing and he rambles for like five minutes, and then, bam! He’s happy again and not quietly brooding. I’ll never tell him I do this because I’m afraid it won’t work anymore if he knows about it. It’s foolproof, though; it works every single time, no matter how bothered he is.
Image credits: alskdjfhgtk
#4
If you look happy to see someone every time you see them, they will eventually be happy to see you.
Image credits: 2pass2
#5
Instead of asking, 'Do you have any questions?' I ask, 'What questions do you have?' The first almost always results in silence, while the second helps people feel comfortable asking questions.
Image credits: MediocrePaladin
#6
Be direct and personal when you need things. Instead of asking IF anyone has an EpiPen, ask WHO has an EpiPen. Instead of saying, 'Someone call 911,' point to someone and say, 'Go call 911 and come tell me when they are on the way.
Image credits: Polyfkery
#7
Saying 'You're right!' instead of 'I know' makes you look less like a [jerk] and doesn't diminish something someone else may have just found out.
Image credits: FantomUnicorn
#8
On an airplane, if my seatmate is hogging the armrest or being too chatty, I grab the barf bag. Works every time.
Image credits: ab82bank
#9
When somebody shy is speaking, if you look at them and nod your head, it encourages them to keep talking.
Image credits: unknown
#10
I currently manage around 240 people among six restaurants. It is often hard to get them to do what is needed. I have found that saying, 'I need your help' is effective in getting them on board. People want to feel needed and that they are making a difference. Expressing that need to them as much as possible makes all the difference in the world.
Image credits: aaronmicook
#11
When you are standing in a group and somebody tells a joke or something funny happens, people tend to look towards the person they like the most while laughing.
Image credits: RiDDDiK1337
#12
Put headphones in and play the music that fits your hoped-for mood. It shifts me over to it mentally. It really helps when I need to calm down or when I need to feel happier.
Image credits: sunflowersfornudes
#13
Don’t say “it’s okay” when someone apologizes. Say something like, “thank you for apologizing.”if someone needs to apologize to you, then it was something that isn’t okay. my mom teaches this to her kindergartners and it really does make a difference. opens doors for growth and conversation too. “thank you for apologizing, I don’t like it when you hit me.” or whatever.
Image credits: katiebugdisney
#14
If you hand something to someone they will take it. It’s a lot of fun
Image credits: surrrah
#15
At this point it's pretty well known, but Ive been using it for a few decades and has a special spot for me because I 'came up with it' (and was probably the 3 billionth person to 'come up with it').Flip a coin if you cant decide something, and then follow whether or not you feel happy or disappointed with the result that it gives you.
Image credits: Erudite_Delirium
#16
Don’t apologise. Thank them.When you’re delivering food that’s taken a while to cook don’t say “sorry for the delay,” say “thanks for your patience”
Saying sorry focuses on your fault. Thanking focuses on their good quality.
Image credits: Conchobar8
#17
I work in an office. When people stop by my desk and refuse to leave me alone, I get up and refill my water bottle while they are talking to me. Instead of walking back to my desk, I walk them to theirs. They instinctively will sit down. Then I just sever the conversation and get back to work.
Image credits: Electricpants
#18
"Tell me about your day. " instead of "How was your day?"I do it when I really want to chat with a person and not get the usual "It's been OK" then nothing out of them after that.
Heard it on reddit a while back and I am amazed at how well it works. You get some info out of the person that you can maybe relate to, or help with or share similar ideas/stories.
Image credits: Shuski_Cross
#19
If you need to deescalate someone and get them to communicate, ask them questions about numbers or personal information. I work in emergency services. If someone is totally distraught and shut down, asking their phone number, address, Social Security number, or birth date can pull them out of an emotional place and bring them back to a headspace where they can talk about what happened more easily. I often ask these questions even after I have the information, just to deescalate.
Image credits: Orpheus91
#20
If I desperately need to poo and I'm on my way to the bathroom (eg. driving home or walking to one) I'll imagine it in my mind as being really far away. This stops the urgency and I find I can get there calmly :-)
Image credits: Funny1sland
#21
My husband says, 'I will give you $50 if you hiccup two more times.' It works amazingly well — he's never had to pay me.
Image credits: toxik0n
#22
Say hello to everybody you know, and say it with a smile. Just imagine: If someone walks into you twice a year and both times you smile and greet them enthusiastically, they will think of you as a nice person. So little effort for a person to find you friendly!
Image credits: sjuulbakkie
#23
Making people think that you need them is always better than asking them to simply do something for you.i.e: instead of saying: "Can you do this for me?" you should say: "Listen I need you help; I can't do this."
Makes people feel good about themselves and even like you on a deeper level.
Image credits: Doctor_Philly
#24
I have a coworker who is an excessive talker. She has a heart of gold and means no harm whatsoever, but I don't have time to listen to her stream of consciousness every day. Anytime she comes into my office to chat, I give her a minute to get the gist out, and then I stand and walk out of my office. She always follows and continues yammering, and we walk right back to her cubicle. Sometimes I'll ditch her in the hallway under a guise of forgetting something at my desk. She hasnt noticed yet that I've been walking her back to her desk for months.
Image credits: Tycho278
#25
Thank someone for a trait you want them to have. Instead of telling a customer you’re sorry for the wait, tell them, 'Thank you for your patience or understanding.' Works wonders."
Image credits: Hasp3
#26
If you're trying to pick out dinner with your partner, rather than ask, 'What do you want?' and getting the typical 'I don't know, anything' answer and then having suggestions shot down, start with, 'What do you NOT want? Used it a few times in some of my relationships, and it's the godsend question
Image credits: FartKilometre
#27
When you're in an argument, find something to agree on, then push your main point.
Image credits: bobvella
#28
give kids 2 choices instead of letting them pick from whateveryou control.
could be 2 points of time. like "now" or in 10 minutes,
or do you want the red or the blue shirt on
things like that
works wonderfully. they feel in control, but have absolutely no control.
can work with some adults too
#29
When my wife is talking to a man about something technical, often he'll talk back to me. When that happens I turn to face my wife, which forces his attention where it should be.#30
I work as a Creative Director. I have a lot of great clients, unfortunately with a few bad managers from their side. They usually go with the mantra of "If it's not my idea, it's not a good idea". I end up (sometimes) telling them about something Google, Tesla, Amazon, Samsung, Etc. is doing, and how we could try it. They jump at these ideas. The ideas are actually mine or my teams. Works like a charm.Use this sparingly. Using it as an easy escape is not a good idea. It works, but know when to use it. If you use it all the time, it won't make you look any better. It will also allow people to be promoted who aren't capable of doing the job (pointed out by rutefoot [ Thank you]). Good luck everyone!
Image credits: usrnmtkn1
#31
I’m a professional poker player. When I am in a pot with one other player, I often try to make them laugh when they are thinking about what to do. If you can get them to laugh, it sets them in a mood where they are unlikely to bluff.
Image credits: Amo4sho4sho
#32
To deescalate a situation or someone who is prone to violence, address them at one or two emotional levels below where they are. For example, If their anger is at a level 10, then you should come in at a level 8. Being completely calm, reserved, and polite only pisses people off more because you 'clearly don't understand the magnitude of the situation. If they are screaming and yelling, you need to come in loud — while not attacking them, and agreeing with them (to a point). When you agree with their anger, they are more open to listening to you. Works pretty much every time, though there may be a little up and down in the middle. Just follow the person's lead, while always being a level below them.
Image credits: Cardfan60123
#33
If someone says they have the hiccups, ask them to prove it. 9/10 times, their hiccups will disappear. Having to summon a hiccup in order to demonstrate will trick your diaphragm into just Not Hiccuping.I've been able to twist it around on myself with some success as well, but it takes practice. You realize you have hiccups, then /try/ to hiccup. Actively try to make yourself do another one. It'll stop.
#34
I have to work with kids a lot, having a summertime “job” where I volunteer to assist counselors at a camp for service hours and having five younger siblings. DONT tell them not to do something. If I told you, “DONT THINK ABOUT UNICORNS!” you’ll immediately think about unicorns for the split second I say it. If I instead said, “THINK ABOUT TURTLES!” you’ll think about turtles for at least that split second I said it. Don’t tell a kid not to something, rather tell them to do something else. Instead of “Don’t hit your sister!” say, “Let’s play a nice game with your sister.” That way you don’t put the idea into their mind that you don’t want them doing it, which, in their childish manner, fuels the fire to do it more.#35
If you need to remember something, think about it while doing something noticeably unusual. This will pair the memory with the "something", so that when it is noticed later on it will trigger that particular memory.e.g. I need to take out the garbage before going to bed.
Put your pillow at the foot of your bed.
#36
When you’re talking to someone, they will naturally fill silence. It’s subconscious. If you want them to keep talking, keep your own mouth shut. This is useful if you’re ever in a verbal altercation.#37
Listen to someone without giving advice or asking for more information. This typically gets me more information than if I were to be pushy about it.#38
When I have something important to say to my kids, I say it very quietly so that they listen. They're immune to my yelling, but whispering gets their attention.#39
This isn't something I've used but I think it's worth sharing. Derren Brown said that once there was a muscley drunk guy that wanted to beat him up and said the classic "what are you looking at." Derren replied with "the wall outside my house is four feet tall." The idea is that it puts the aggravated person on the back foot and takes them out of that adrenaline filled state. Anyways he sat down and the guy started crying to him about his gf. He is Derren Brown though so I wouldn't recommend this to everyone#40
I work with a bunch of idiot lawyers, and I use the phrase 'You’re correct' all the time. Even if it’s one teeny, tiny thing they’re correct about, it makes them feel smart and they instantly soften. It also keeps them listening because they’re hoping more flattery will come down the pike.#41
This is dumb and shouldn't work. But I'm a bartender. And if I ask someone if they want another drink and nod my head at the same time most people are inclined to do it.from Bored Panda https://bit.ly/3xxgiW0
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