Hiring managers have the thankless job of sifting through hundreds if not thousands of resumes, which most probably follow the same formula, style, and general information. The only silver lining may be the commonly accepted standard to keep a resume to less than two pages. But there are always candidates who break the mould.
So hiring managers from across the globe shared resume stories that either made them want to reject the candidate without a second look or hire them on the spot after an internet user asked for some details. So scroll through and upvote the ones you would hire or reject, no questions asked.
#1
I had a funny typo on a resume I once reviewed. It read:"Assassinated the lead florist on site"
Obviously it was meant to say "assisted".
Image credits: Snailtopus
#2
I received a resume from an applicant that included a letter of recommendation from his cat. The letter was hilarious and signed with a clipart paw print. I thought it was great and wanted to bring him in, but the manager for the position wasn't as crazy about it. I guess the point is, humor in an application can work for you, but it really depends on the person.
Image credits: darthnut
#3
Guy submitted a resume claiming to be a 'ghost writer' for a local college.In lieu of a college degree, he listed the units he wrote assignments for and the average grades his clients got.
Image credits: OkButHurry
Of course, these stories are all good examples of why it can be hard to reduce a person to just a few lines of text. Just as a gravestone can’t capture the full essence of a life, a resume is at best just a snapshot, yet we allow it to dictate so much of our lives and futures. The word resume itself just means “to summarize” in French, yet we allow these summaries to decide entire careers. It’s as if the back of a book would be the number one decider in whether people read it or leave it on the shelf.
Despite the French name, Renaissance genius, artist, and inverter Leonardo da Vinci is credited with inventing the first resume, in the form of a letter to potential employers. So just to be clear, a man who was era-defining in multiple fields still needed to write out a brief biography of himself just to maybe get a job.
#4
I had one application dropped off by the applicant’s mother. She told me “If you hire him, you probably shouldn’t trust him with money.”*update edit: I threw the application away after she turned around. I was hiring for a sales clerk position at my family bakery.
Image credits: Barzilla1911
#5
I was hiring for a very competitive IT role last year and one guy, who didn't have the best real world experience, added a single QR code at the bottom of his CV. I scanned it and it took me to an online portfolio, including a secure lab with simulations he'd ran, allowing ME to test scripts he'd written and also play around in his lab environment. Honestly, I'd never seen anything like it. The guy got the job and has continued to be a great fit.
Image credits: NothingBreaking
#6
It was 14 pages...ETA: finance position with 5-10 years experience. There’s only so many different ways you can describe finance responsibilities - and summarizing is a skill. Dude never pitched for the interview.
Image credits: zenaide1
Some of the examples here listed things like how much they could bench, random physical features, and assorted fun facts. While it may seem strange, that was the norm in the last century, as a resume would be a sort of alternative or stand-in for a referral from someone who knew you. So maybe these resumes were simply doing it old school and didn’t want to conform to the monolithic professional standards everyone else follows.
#7
Not a hiring manager but I once wrote stuff like 'able to plug in USB on first try' and 'can do up to 10 push-up before going into sleep mode' in the Additional Skills section. They later told me I was invited because they wanted to see if I really can do the first one.
Image credits: Im_dad_serious
#8
A guy put his bench, squat and deadlift numbers in his personal skills section for a bar job.It spawned a long tradition of asking bartenders what they could bench when they applied for a job.
Image credits: anon
#9
Someone sent over their CV written entirely in the papyrus font from Microsoft word. May as well have gone all out and used windings.
Image credits: dolphintitties
Now we can just Google a person and find out all sorts of things unless they keep a shallow digital footprint, but in the pre-internet age, it was pretty normal to send a letter or letters of introduction to get the ball rolling. We still use cover letters, but these evolved from an older tradition where a known third party would give someone a letter from a stranger in the hope that they would find some interest in them.
#10
I know a guy who put that he had a black belt in full contact Origami
Image credits: MyAntipodeanFriend
#11
I got my first IT job because I put in additional skills modifying Fallout 3 using GECK. I just loaded custom packs and got them to work and they gave me the job miraculously even tho I was underqualified
Image credits: Burner7788
#12
Hiring a software engineer. Among his impressive list of skills were Notepad and Wordpad.
Image credits: EatMoarToads
These days, some applicants try to get creative, to stand out from the crowd. In some countries, the numbers are almost astronomical. In India, around 220500000 applications were filed for government jobs, of which only 722000 were recommended for the next interview steps between 2014 and 2022. So getting someone to even look at your resume can feel like a challenge in itself.
#13
A guy was said we had to hire him because he had a disability and it would be discrimination if we didn't. He wasn't hired, he called the CEO a few times to complain. We went thru it at least 3 x over the course of multiple hirings.
Image credits: free112701
#14
“I would like to work at your factory”I don’t have a factory. Read the f*****g job description.
Image credits: Nichinungas
#15
I was on a hiring committee for a college instructor. The candidate was asked to provide a statement of commitment to the college and its mission. An entire paragraph was plagiarized - copied and pasted from a website. I noticed that the writer's voice drastically changed, so I pasted a sentence into Google and immediately found the source. He did not get an interview.
Image credits: mizboring
As a result, people have started to make multimedia applications, using videos, songs and even skywriting. Creative, yes, but we all know that constantly rewinding a video to catch a piece of information is a lot more annoying than finding it in some text. And making a hiring manager annoyed seems like a pretty bad choice, all things considered, unless the position is literally related to video editing and creation or some more creative field.
#16
“I have incredible attention to dealtail”
Image credits: 4sOfCors
#17
I once saw under Achievements on a CV- "former worlds youngest person."It made me laugh so much I gave them an interview. In the end they didn't sell themselves well enough to get the role, but it brightened my morning of filtering.
#18
Second language was Klingon.Too bad the guy was a total a*s during his interview
Image credits: Justme124
#19
Once I received a resume that had "Raid leader for WOW in top guild of a server" this was about 9 years ago.The other hiring managers laughed their asses off and said this guy is a joke and they all dismissed him. Me, I asked the guy to come in for an interview and he did pretty well and I hired him.
The reason I brought the guy in for interview was because I'm an avid WOW player at that time and I know the s**t raid leaders go through. Trying to get a large number of people together, coordinate resources and rewards, getting guides together and telling people to up their healing/dps and not stand in fire. All done virtually via vent and forum postings (meaning you never met these guild members in person). You need some great leadership skills and project management. Also at that time I was dealing with a lot of people offsite so I thought this guy would be a good fit.
9 years later (I've left the company), the WOW guy I hired turned out to be great, especially in the last 9 years when corporations decide that working from home, virtual meetings is the way to go to cut cost. His skill set as a raid leader translated very well with remote project management and is now the manager of the hiring managers that laughed at his resume.
This was at a Fortune 500 financial company
TL:DR If you stand in the fire, I'm not healing your a*s.
#20
Bad emails. When interviewing for a professional position and your contact email is 69SMOKAHGURL420BLAZING it a terrible way to start the resume.
Image credits: jaynus006
#21
Hiring for retail. Two all time favorites:"Experienced at stalking the cooler."
"Responsible for closing paperwork after each s**t."
Image credits: 2243217910346
#22
Had a kid applying to work at a Sam Goody as a stockboy write that he was a petroleum transference engineer for Exxon at his last job. His job was pumping gas, I hired him on the spot.
Image credits: Canadian_Neckbeard
#23
For the love of god, triple check the spelling of any names. The number of CV's that simply go straight into the bin because they can't spell my, or my company name correctly is too damn high.#24
I've seen resumes that DIDN'T HAVE A NAME ON THEM.#25
Someone sent us a 20 minute long video why they wanted to work with us. Not hired, just too much.Another applicant explained her family situation honestly in the cover letter, she fit our culture, and as well as amazing skills, we hired her.
#26
If you lasted less than 6 months at every job you've ever had I am probably not going to hire you#27
This woman had her preschool and elementary school graduation dates on her resume. It was a no from me.#28
Not so much the content of the application, but what was on the application.A handprint.
It was for a food handling position and he was grungy enough to leave a print from where he held down the paper to write on it. Instant no.
Looking back, yeah, there was a chance he'd have been fine, we could have taught proper hand washing and all that, but at the time we declined to grant an interview.
#29
Recruiter here. I have a few:* Resume - "hire me lol"
* Video interview with another candidate, she was in a hospital bed and just gave birth to her son prior to her interview. HIRED
* Another video interview, the guy was chugging a tall boy Coors Lights...
Edit: Just to add little to the second story, she was looking for additional income for her move. It was a part-time, temporary job with very easy work. She was a very bubbly person.
#30
not a hiring manager, but I was working at a job and my roommate wanted to apply. on the application he wrote "can make 3 minute ramen in 2:50"he got the interview
#31
I work at an Escape Room. We once received a resume that consisted in a webpage address protected by a password, and three well-crafted riddles that we had to solve to get the password. We spent an hour doing it with two colleagues, and it included decrypting a code from a specific frame of Zodiac by David Fincher. It was simply amazing.Sadly, we weren't hiring at the time, and she had found another job we we started hiring again.
EDIT: David Fincher, not Lynch. My bad.
EDIT 2: since I'm receiving a lot of answers including pieces of advice on what we should have done, here's some important precisions:
* No, we couldn't have hired her on the whim. You can't create work from nothing in Escape Rooms. We have 6 rooms, we need 1 Game Master per room when it's running, that's all. Our building is full, we can't add other rooms, so we don't need to hire until someone leaves.
* No, we won't fire someone to hire that person. First, because we're living in a civilized country that doesn't allow people to get fired without any reason. Second, because firing someone that way isn't how you keep people motivated and invested, and our boss knows that.
* The fact that she knew how to create riddles doesn't mean she would have made a great hire anyway. We're already 13, and we **all** know how to make riddles, that's part of the job. We also all have other skills that contribute to that job. What made her application special is the way she made it, reflecting her motivation, not her skills per se.
* No, we shouldn't have hired her to design a room. First, because we didn't have any room to design, our building was full, and it was more than a year until we needed to create a room. Second, because we already have designers (remember, we're 13, plus the bosses, and we all have the skills she had). Third, because designing a room is a 3-4 weeks jobs, not a full-time one. Fourth, because it requires other skills than simply "creating riddles", and neither you and I know if she had them. Fifth, because you simply doesn't hire a newbie to design your next $20.000-$30.000 room that will be 1/6th of your company revenue for the next 3 to 6 years, that's absolutely nonsensical.
* To the people saying we're idiots for not having hired her: you know nothing.
#32
I was working for a small digital agency and we were looking for designers and illustrators - general multi skilled creative types.The boss wanders in with a sly grin and a big folder. It was from a guy who wanted a job. I came over and he started flicking through it. Page after page of sexy cartoons. Lots of them furry type stuff. Boob, butts, lips, figures intertwined, lots of detailed musculature.
So I was like "Well it's quite good for what it is... but what else is there? Is there another section?"
Nope. Nothing else. Just a folder completely full of semi-pornographic cartoon people and sexy anthropomorphised animals.
Edit: He was not hired. It wasn't because of the cartoons, it was because it was *all* just those cartoons. Would have liked to see some commercial applications of illustration, or something showing he could work to requirements, or a variety of work showing different styles. Also this was 15ish years ago.
#33
One resume read "expert in 'indoor horticulture'..." Indoor horticulture was in quotes.#34
Had a résumé come in from a guy we fired about 2 years previously. Had a gap in his employment where the time was he had been with us, so not even like he didn’t realise!#35
I had a candidate who worked in couseling in the past, mostly with kids who had been through trauma. They had a line on their resume that said:"Expert in child kidnapping"
I had to at least give them an interview because I understood the intent but the wording was just hilariously unfortunate.
Edit: For those seeking clarity, he was an expert in kidnapping *cases*.
No, he didn't get the job. Nice guy, but not a good fit for the role. :)
#36
I had a resume from a potential interview candidate that listed his reason for leaving his last job as: "I found a body." No further explanation. You bet your sweet patootie I called him in for an interview. (As a strategy to get an interview, it worked!) The condensed story is that he found a body while walking the grounds at his job checking to make sure all gated areas were secure and clear of debris. When he found the body, he called the police. He was fired because he broke internal reporting protocol. He was supposed to notify his immediate supervisor and not outside authorities. It was the supervisor's responsibility to call the police.#37
Having “attention to detail” listed under skills followed by spelling and grammatical errors throughout the CV. My favourite!#38
Generally, if someone misuses apostrophes, spells vendor names in all caps or includes religious/political statements on their CV, I fire the recruiter that sent the document to me.In one case, the "CV" I was presented with was a 30 slide PowerPoint presentation featuring JAVA in the centre of every other slide accompanied with clipart inspired by the first 32 bit release of After Dark.
Immediately that was a no hire.
#39
I helped a buddy revise his resume. I formatted it and organized it, but I left some spots bolded and told him he had to fill them out. Under one of his jobs I said "add some b******t with fancy adjectives here". He didn't revise the resume and applied to a ton of jobs with that line left in there. I have never laughed so hard.Edit: sorry I know I am not a hiring manager, but I really wish I could have seen the reaction of the hiring managers that received his resume.
#40
I once rejected a candidate because she dotted her “i” with little hearts#41
Not a hiring manager, but for years I was applying for jobs with a high school qualification for art & design listed asfart and design
Got 2 jobs in that time and countless rejections.
#42
Not a hiring manager but was reviewing resume's to be forwarded on. It was more about what wasn't there. These were primarily people who were trying to transition from IT to IT security. I saw plenty of resumes stuffed with IT certs and whatnot, but barely any of them took any time to go get qualifications for the field they wanted to work in. You've got to realize you have to get someone to pick you out of all the candidates. You need to show them that you actually have a drive and a passion for it. When I got my first security job, the hiring manager told me that what interested him was that I had a bunch of security certs, that told him this wasn't just any sysadmin applying at whatever. Now of course my passion came out in the interview and secured me the job, but to get there I had to get noticed.My advice, if you're trying to transition, I don't care so much about what you used to do as much as what you can do in the future, and your resume needs to speak to that.
#43
Was looking for a casual sales person, this 18yo put a selfie of her which was taken in a car showing alot of cleavage. Not what I was looking for. I guess she was hoping I was a middle aged single man.#44
Hired for a junior UX role. An applicant's CV header was "Your bubbly UX designer", which was good enough to warrant an interview. In the interview, when we asked what was their dream job if they we in a completely different area, they answered "Juventus manager".We knew she was a keeper.
#45
Someone had spelled “of” incorrectly on their entire CV. “Ov”I almost wanted to interview them just to see how they remembered to breathe
#46
I have several CV's that will never make the cut. I keep them in a non GDPR proof binder hidden out of view. I work as an IT recruiter.* Normal CV on the job site. Junior profile, 18 years old , just finished school. Pretty normal CV, except , at the bottom, he writes that he has a small d**k and likes guys. The CV goes back and forth in the office. Eventually we decide to call him and ask why he put that on his CV. Turns out he had to make the CV for school, left his PC open and one of his class mates thought it was funny to add that to his profile...
* A CV with a picture a man in only his boxers. No headshot, just his abs , boxers and legs. We did not call the guy.
* Several CV's with people ranting against the goverment, religion or anything else. Obvious proof of mental disabilities. People writing things such as "I will do the time for the crime I may or may not have comitted". I haven't called any of them.
* Cover letters with the wrong company name on it. So many cover letters with the wrong company on it. Recruiters will forget to change your name when sending you an inmail , applicants will forget to change the name when applying. We really need to get rid of mandatory cover letters. I'll still call them if their profile is decent.
* People being open about just putting their CV online so they can keep their unemployment benefits. At least they don't waste my time.
#47
I had someone hand me a resume with the html code of a porn url mixed in mid-way through. I guess he was watching porn while updating his resume and somehow dragged in a link. Guess he didn't proof read it.#48
I once received a resume written in a size 60 font.It was just one page..
#49
I applied with [this cover letter](http://i.imgur.com/HMA3I4B.png) and the subject line "Copywriter: Will Work for Beer" to a job that I was underqualified for. It caught the eye of the headhunter for the ad agency and was enough to get me an interview. Shortly after that I was hired and ended up working there for a few years.I remember writing that letter and feeling frustrated because I wasnt hearing back from any of the places I was applying, so I said, "F**k it, I'm gonna write one that is more me." However, this probably wouldn't work everywhere, but it fit the culture of the agency. Plus the job listing said that I would be working for beer brands as clients and that free beer was a perk of the job.
#50
I was interviewing people for an IT company. Dude put experience with “skuzzy” on his resume. (For non techies, SCSI is a type of hard drive pronounced as he wrote it but never in a million years written that way.)#51
One time I interviewed a guy an went with another candidate, maybe a week after the Interview I received a card via usps that said “Thank You” with a note that said thank you for the opportunity to interview for the position...I was taken aback by it as in all my years I’d never received anything like that... it made him stick in my mind and I reached out to him the next time a position came open and he got the job...
to this day he’s the only person who’s ever sent me a thank you card after being rejected for a position
***Fixed the Canada Typo... my bad, sometimes my phone thinks it knows better than I lol
#52
Someone put CEO at “Stay At Home Mom LLC” with her address and phone number on it. I know being a mom is a hard job but it was a little irrelevant to the position and made it seem like she didn’t take applying seriously....Also we had an ex employee reapply to our business, claiming he had experience managing at our location and left voluntarily for personal reasons...he was a bottom line employee who got fired for drinking on the job. I guess he thought new management wouldn’t notice?
#53
Not me but my best friend is, a woman put "very good at selling bread" and "not good at selling fish"Je didn't took her because she wasn't qualified anyway but still funny tho.
#54
Your resume is no place to be funny or cute. I can't tell you how many different versions of "stay at home mom" I've seen. Just be open and honest about it. Saying "domestic engineer" or something of that nature comes off dumb and dishonest.Edit for clarification: I'm not saying personality is a bad thing. But in professional settings, a cover letter or the interview itself are better places to showcase said personality.
#55
I once had someone indicate that they had 8 years of experience with a specific, very unique, product. That product had only been around for 2 years and initial development had only begun 4 years ago. When asked about it, they claimed that they were on the development team and were the person that came up with the product. I had been on the 6 person team since it's inception and knew everyone involved.Also, had someone list a previous position from two years ago on their resume at the company I work for. It was the exact position I currently held, same organization, appeared to be almost copy pasted from my job description. I had been in that position for almost 5 years.
#56
I've told this story before, but it's one of my favorites.I work in an analytical field where programming and mathematical skills are pretty important. I had a candidate for a lead analyst position submit a 9 page resume (which was already a deal breaker). The last page was entirely dedicated to "Skills and Attributes". The highlights were:
* Extremely beautiful
* Highly skilled in math (obviously)
The candidate was an adjunct professor at a local tech school. They had a Master's degree in statistics from a mid-level state university. So yes, they were qualified - but definitely not as remarkably qualified as they thought they were.
The candidate did get an interview, believe it or not. But they weren't hired.
#57
Resumes are a Go/No Go for whether I will look at you as a serious candidate. I'm not using them to determine who is the best candidate. If I'm going to consider you seriously you need to make it easy for me to know if you can do the job you applied for. As such, resumes should be the following:* **Concise** - The resume is a place to summarize your experience and qualifications so keep it short. ~~Most people should never go over one page on a CV~~. If you're 35 and you still have your high school extracurricular activities on your resume, its time to trim the fat. If you have a four page CV its going in the bin.
* **Orderly** - All of the information should be organized clearly so I can look at it and know your qualifications. People read in an "F" pattern. As such, the most important info should be at the top with major bullet points down the left side.
* **Honest** - Don't post it if you didn't do it. I'm okay with stretching the truth, but if you say you were a QA engineer, you best be able to back that up with some knowledge.
* **Professional** - The CV answers the question "What have I done and what can I do?" not the question "Who am I?" As such, it should be factual not charismatic. Use your cover letter to show your personality.
* **SPELL CHECKED** - Holy c**p, spell check your work. Unless you are writing your CV in Notepad, spell check is automatic. If you are ignoring the red lines, then you aren't the kind of person I want working for me.
* **PROOF READ** - After you write it, put it down for a day and look at it the next. If you proof read something immediately after writing it, you will read what you think you wrote, not what you actually wrote.
Things that should be towards the top:
* Your name and contact info
* Your experience
* Your education
* Your certifications
Things to put towards the bottom:
* Awards and recognition
* Skills
Consider dropping:
* Hobbies and interests
Edit: Thanks for the feedback everyone. The way I wrote it originally made it look like I took a hard line on the one page limit. Two pages doesn't put you in the no bin, but I do expect you to be able to summarize your experience well.
#58
I asked a guy why he had periods of months and years where he didn't list jobs. He responded "I don't really like to work. Look, if you treat me well, I'll treat you well and work hard." I liked his no b******t attitude and hired him. He was a great employee.#59
My manager once told me that he started calling the numbers on references immediately after someone left the room and the interview had gone well. More than once the candidates phone would ring as they passed reception.#60
"I have Ak-47, killed 7 thiefs" - security guard job.#61
I saw this asked before, and said in one I had a resume state for work experience be "hacker - The Internet"They also stated they've been both "hired and fired for hacking various things." and have "never been convicted of a computer crime."...
#62
The hand he used to give me his resume was tattooed with a swastika.#63
Had someone apply for our position that was a hairdresser.The position was for a nurse. They said they wanted to "try out the medical field"
They didn't get the job.
#64
Someone had on their resumé “I do not complain. I’ll do what you ask and I won’t complain. I’m willing to work hard and go the extra mile...without complaining. I do not like complainers and whiners and I will never be one.” I called him immediately. He’s been here 6 years now and is easily the most reliable employee we have. He complained one time though. Another employee accidentally set him on fire and he said he didn’t want to work with that guy anymore.#65
Not on a resume but during the first contact with them they asked how tough our drug testing was.#66
In response to our posting for a software developer:SUMMARY OF QUALIFICATIONS
• 22 years experience as full-stack web developer
• BA in Organizational Management
• Spent too much time on the computer during childhood
He was hired within the week.
#67
Every referee has a sentence or two about how we shouldn't call them because they 'parted on bad terms' or it had been a while.Some applicants listed referees who, when called, barely remembered working with the person.
#68
We used to do this, we would reject on a faux pas. Then we realized we were chewing through good candidates who didn't have the money to use a professional writing service. If we are hiring for a developmental role (someone we expect needs to grow) then we shouldn't hold them to the standard we would expect *after* they have developed. We decided to start picking resume's for experience we think we want and ignore minor mistakes or odd formatting choices. We have even re-interviewed people who we think just had an 'off' day. Now, we have to do this because qualified candidates for our positions are fairly rare so we have to be a little more flexible.#69
Not a hiring manager but my dad is. He trashes every single resume that mentions a criminal history, and I just think that’s really sad#70
I was a hiring manager at a major "hipster" clothing retailer, now I work in manufacturing and I mostly oversee production and logistical matters but I do handle the hiring and HR for my team which ranges from 3-5 people. In both fields I've found that anyone who worked for In n' Out for more than a year is a solid hire. The way they train people and the sense of urgency and pride in work that they instill in their employees is fantastic. I almost feel like one of those parasitic insects that makes another species do the hard work of child rearing when I score a former in n out employee.#71
Bad clip art of a bald eagle. No idea why, just was in the header of the resume.Common one that bugs me: you misspelled your alma mater's name. It's not uncommon for colleges to go by shortened names (example would be MIT). While the correct form is the long name, I can accept the shortened common usage one. I have sat on some hiring committees where folks didn't realize the name of the prestigious school listed was the specific program from a well known college, although I think that says more about previous hiring committees decisions...
To account for common knowledge not always being common I can accept the common usage name of your college/university even if it makes me cringe... But I cannot accept when you just mess up the name altogether. You paid that place a decent chunk of money to get a degree there, and spent years of your life there, I think you can be bothered to know their name.
#72
If the person has had an excessive amount of jobs. If I am going to invest the time and cost of hiring and educating a person I want to be comfortable knowing they will be around a long time.#73
Spelling errors throughout will usually have me going to the next one. If you’re not detailed oriented in this first impression, my assumption is your work will look like this as well. No one has time to review your work for accuracy. People always make mistakes and that’s how you learn, but a résumé should be free of obvious errors.#74
I was hiring for a research position and made it clear (I thought) that the data was from surveys, focus groups, that sort of thing. Got a lot of resumes from people who had none of the listed requirements but it was the ones who had some of them that confused me - I'm pretty sure your skills in small-mammal dissection are not going to be any help in a words-based role, maybe re-read your resume *before* you send it in?#75
A few years ago I bought an already working franchise location in the next town over, which is a very small and quiet town. The previous owner let go his employee with a severance so I didn't have to take over her contract. Being my new and only store, I decided to work by myself until getting settled and hire help if I seemed to need it.The first day I opened the store, about an hour after opening, the former employee comes by to introduce herself and drop a resume. I tell her that I'll consider it since she worked there for about 5 years mostly on her own (previous owner was not a hands-on boss) and put it in a drawer. During the rest of the day, I noticed people standing on the sidewalk looking in, and after doing that they came in and made a purchase. After 4 or 5 people did this, I asked a woman what made her look before coming in, and she said "oh I wouldn't have come in if that red-headed c**t was still working here".
Needless to say, I put a "under new management" sign on the door, using the back of the c**t's CV and no one else looked before coming in that day :-D
#76
They were convicted 3 times of attempted murder i immediately hired them#77
I was an AV Engineering Team Lead for a startup for a time. A couple of years ago, I was hiring to fill about 30 slots of a very basic AV tech position. I had about 20 applicants at the time, so if you were reasonably competent, you were in.I got one resume and cover letter through our website from a guy who I will henceforth refer to as "the f**kup". Every third word on this thing was spelled incorrectly, punctuation was optional, and spacing was randomized. Thinking "This can't be real", I called one of the guy's references.
Oh boy, did I ever get an earful from a grumpy business owner. The f**kup in question was so much of a f**kup that he was applying for positions in my area because he was effectively blacklisted from just about every job site and labor company in his hometown - a medium sized US city with a very, very large audiovisual job market.
The reference told me that he'd told the f**kup not to hand his name/number out as a reference because the f**kup had caused more than $200,000 of damages to the reference's company's equipment the previous year. He went on to name, correctly and from memory, the other references that the f**kup likely listed on his resume - friendly competition of the reference - and told me that they would all say the same thing. So I called around. The f**kup is apparently quite the liability.
We did not end up hiring the f**kup, but I made some new business friends in another city. We've since collaborated on a couple of larger conference gigs that hit their city first and then our city afterwards so... Thanks, F**kup.
#78
Not hiring, but one time a dude had "excessive masturbation" listed as a hobby. Not recommended, unless you want to hire for a product tester in certain branches.Edit: Read it from another one's post. He had his CV proof read by one of his friends. Always proof read your friends' edits, folks!
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