Nobody wants "demon bird mothballs" permanently carved on their hand. People had better opt for ink scribbles like “inspiration,” “my journey,” or “live life to the fullest.”
But in some cases, this is the price you pay for one, lack of research; two, impulsive decision making; and three, poor translation. There’s also an aspect of cultural appropriation with Westerners tattooing Hanzi and Kanji (the Chinese and Japanese character sets) that cannot be overlooked.
It doesn't, however, deter people from getting one. You probably still remember Britney Spears’ infamous bikini tattoo that was supposed to mean ‘mysterious,’ but turned out to be ‘strange.’ With numerous examples way worse than Britney's surfing around online, we were wondering what people fluent in Japanese and Chinese have to say about such a trend.
So scroll down for the worst tattoos of Far East logograms spotted by people who know the real meaning behind them, and be sure to check out our previous articles with more fails like these here and here.
#1
I speak Japanese. A guy had a massive Kanji tattoo on his arm. I asked him, “what did you ask them to put on you?” He said “oh, this? It means courage.”Sir, that means breastmilk.
#2
Dude I worked with long time ago had "to the grave" on his arm.Both of our managers came from China (one was Chinese, the other Vietnamese who grew up in China). When he asked the one what his tattoo said, she said "cheapskate!"
He was mortified and said "no, no, it means to the grave" and she said "yeah, when you die, you'll take all your belongings with you to the grave. You won't leave anything for anyone. You're cheap" he says "no, no, it means I take all my secrets to the grave!" She goes "that's not what your arms says"
He was soooo pissed.
#3
I saw a manager demanding Karen b***hing out a cashier with “chicken” on her neck. I asked her about her cool tattoo and she said it means “hope.” Uh, nope - chicken. I just love whomever did this to her over-entitled self.#4
It’s not me but my stepdad got a symbol on the back of his neck that he THOUGHT meant “warrior” or “strong” or something like that. Someone told him one day that it 100% says “spicy.”#5
One of my coworkers requested the character for “free” as in “freedom” which would be 自由, however because he just used translation apps, he ended up with 免 as in 免税 which means “tax free.” Its also on his hand and is always visible.#6
鸡蛋 meaning egg tattooed on the side of his face - didn’t help that the man was bald and it took all my willpower to not laugh in his face#7
I used to work at a bar and a lady came in with 自転車 on her shoulder. I speak Japanese and asked her what it meant. She replied proudly “driven to be self motivated”. That word means bicycle in Japanese.#8
Buddy from high school had the nickname "Beast". Got that tattooed in between his shoulder blades in some Asian looking characters. Home from college over the summer, playing sand volleyball, shirt off, random Asian girl asked him why he had "bread" tattooed there.#9
I read about one once that was supposed to read "badass," which it technically did, but the translation was closer to "evil anus."#10
I can't read it but a girl i was seeing pointed out my ex girlfriend had a tattoo that read something like "demo text" on her shoulder.#11
Not me, but my father once met a woman who wanted to have “bad girl,” like as in “badass,” tattooed on her in Chinese.The characters didn’t really mean that, though. It, uh, meant something more along the lines of a woman who would cheat on her husband and take advantage of men.
#12
There was a somewhat famous dude among the Chinatown dwellers where I lived awhile back. He was a big, buff white guy who would always hang out in Chinatown with shirts that had the sleeves ripped off. He was pointed out to me in roughly this manner, “Look at that guy. His name is Ben. Ben has a tattoo of his name in Chinese on his upper arm. Ben insisted on having the pinyin of his name tattooed instead of being given a proper Chinese name. Ben is proud of his tattoo. Ben likes to introduce himself to the Asian people in Chinatown by pointing to his tattoo.”Ben in pinyin = “pen” (pronounced pe-hn, which does sound like an Asianfied “Ben”). “Pen” in Mandarin means stupid. Dude introduced himself as stupid for years. Afaik no one has ever told him. Everyone knows Ben though.
#13
I saw a picture once of a huge back piece that just said "vegetables".#14
"马马"， which means "horse horse". 100% sure that guy wanted a "mama", but "妈"[mā］means "mom", while "马"[mă] means "horse", they sound similar, but with different tones#15
I knew someone that got the Chinese characters that were supposed to mean “sky”.A Chinese friend of theirs pointed out it meant “ceiling”.
#16
A person from work had a fairly small Japanese tattoo that was supposed to read "Big Brains". (He'd just got his degree or something, so this was a celebration of that)A Japanese co-workers started laughing and said it was more like "Big Head".
#17
When I was in the Army, one of the guys I was in with had this tattoo that he was super proud of.He claimed it meant fierce. We went with it.
A few months later, we're sent, as a group, to San Francisco as part of a recruiting, P/R trip.
We go into Chinatown and a get dinner together.
The guy with the tat always made sure that tat was visible.
We're sitting at the table and the waitress takes our order, as she does she looks at dude and asks if he raises chickens?
Dude: "What are taking about?"
Waitress: "You have chicken on your arm."
Dude: "No, it says fierce"
Waitress in calls to another and says, "What that say?" "tell him."
Second Waitress: "Chicken"
You could just see dude die inside. Especially when a third person who's English wasn't as good says "It say cock"
#18
A coworker of mine has the character for 'water' on the back of her leg. She told me it meant 'harmony'.#19
笨 as a tramp stamp. It literally means stupid.#20
I speak and read mandarin and cantonese fluently, and one time I was in Boston with my family to visit family and we ended up at this seafood restaurant. When my family sat down there was another family there and one of those people being the dad. The dad was huge, like Arnold Schwarzenegger huge, and on his arm he had a massive tattoo saying “打飛機.” I’m pretty sure the guy used to be from the air force because he had a bunch of papers in his back pack and stuff because the restaurant served free meals to people that served in the army, so his tattoo translated from Mandarin to English which means “hit air plane,” it sounds sort of reasonable since he severed in the air force but the thing is if you were to translate this from cantonese to english, it would also mean “hit air plane” but it’s also slang for “to jack off”#21
At a bar with my buddy Steve-o (not the jackass one) and Steve-o is talkin to some guy about his neck tattoos. Guy was saying one meant power and the other meant strength, cause that's who he is (or some other bulls**t along those lines, I had a few pints at that point).Chinese? fella a few seats down chuckles while putting down his beard. Looks up and says "That not Power Strength! That Kitchen Sink!"
Steve-o and I lost all of our spaghetti laughing, sides in orbit with a couple of strangers.
My cheeks hurt just remembering it.
#22
Not Chinese but Japanese saw a guy who had Ball (like a sphere) tattooed on his hand. I asked him what his tattoo said he told me his story about how his older brother had death tattooed on his hand, and he died two years ago. So he thought he should have live on his hand. I had to be the guy to tell him that it was not live but ball#23
My friends mum had what she thought was her name on her chest, her friend at work asked why she had 'population of China' tatted on her#24
We had an exchange student from Japan in the early 2000s. Like what seemed to be the height of those tatoos. We were at a new years eve party and some very drunk lady was showing off her new tatoo that supposedly said something along the lines of "peaceful spirit". The exchange student asked her why she had a tatoo that said bicycle.#25
I know a girl who had "壊疽" ("gangrene") tattooed on her side and it quickly became her nickname ([sic] name-call). Even her family began calling her that. She was a very mean person, simply put, and I can only guess the tattoo artist was getting back at her. This was about five years ago and nobody hears much from her nowadays.#26
"As a matter of priority I declare, I am a wife beater"Is what I saw on a man's arm.
(作为优先事项，我声明我是殴打妻子的人)
he thinks it's means something along the lines of "the best, strongest, manliest man is right here!"
#27
I saw someone with a tattoo that said 下品 "inferior goods" onceBut my favorite was a white person with a tattoo that said 白人 which means "white person"
#28
I knew an English girl in Japan who had kanji for woman on her arm. It is also the sign for ladies toilets. Suddenly gets less sexy.#29
I read it somewhere a person made a tattoo in Chinese which said "something this guy copied from google" and another said "pervert".#30
Shrimp Dumpling, huge tattoo on a jacked guy.#31
Japanese kanji "Friend Boat." They thought it read "friendship."#32
Saw 黄 on someone's neck. It means "yellow".Asked her why she had 'yellow' tattooed on her and she started to explain its spiritual significance in Chinese culture but I had to interrupt and say "No, it really means yellow, like the color."
Felt kind of like a dick afterwards, to be honest, but at the moment i thought it was right to bring it up to her.
#33
I saw a girl with 水炎 tattooed which means 'Water' and 'Inflammation'.She must have wanted 水火 which means 'Water' and 'Fire'.
炎, Inflammation is two 火 Fires, one on top of the other
#34
Someone close to me got a Chinese symbol tattooed on them years ago. One day, I was talking to a colleague/friend and I asked what the tattoo said. Instead of saying Courage (or something like that), it said “human”. Apparently it was missing one line or something that would of made it the correct word.I never told him that his tattoo says Human
#35
As a tattoo artist, I've seen many. I myself, can't read Kanji but I explain to my client that it's probably most likely not the word they want. Most clients realize that and for some reason still get it. Google can't possibly be right all the time, that's my stance on it.Worst one I've seen though, one that was translated to picnic table.
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