Relationships are all about compromise, support, and giving (not just taking). Most couples learn that eventually. They can tell you that things tend to work out when both partners give each other enough time to recharge from taking care of the family all the time.
That’s exactly the type of relationship that mother of three kids Jentri Gilbert Nelson has with her husband Adam. They both need time to themselves. So while her husband goes hunting for deer, ducks, and turkey, she goes ‘hunting’ herself. And by that, she means that she relaxes, reads a book, takes a bath, and has some well-deserved ‘me’ time. Don’t worry, dear Pandas, Jentri doesn’t hurt any animals when she goes ‘hunting!’
Bored Panda spoke to Jentri about her marriage, the dynamic of her relationship with Adam, the importance of mental health, some of the misunderstandings her post created, and about what she’d tell other couples and moms to improve their lives. Scroll down for the full exclusive interview.
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Jentri Gilbert Nelson told the internet what ‘hunting’ time means for her
Image credits: jentri.nelso
Image credits: jentri.nelso
“My husband and I have worked hard to create a balance in our marriage. We try to successfully balance time—work time, time with our children, time with each other, and alone time,” Jentri told Bored Panda.
“As a mother, I always felt guilty about taking time to myself. However, as my job became more demanding, I realized that if I didn’t take time to unwind by myself, I wouldn’t be the kind of wife, mother, and lawyer that I want to be. That realization is where my ‘hunting’ time began.”
She continued: “The day I wrote the Facebook post, I was sitting in the bathtub. I had just told my husband that I needed some ‘hunting’ time. I was thinking about how silly it is that I call my downtime ‘hunting,’ but also about how very important the time is to me—how necessary it is to my mental health. I thought that I would share a quick Facebook post that might encourage other moms to enjoy ‘me’ time without feeling guilty. Moms wear so many hats. Sometimes you need to take every one of those hats off and just be. Just be—in the tub, reading a book, real hunting, working out—whatever you want to do.”
“Relax and be,” she summed up her advice to moms.
Jentri and Adam have 3 kids
Image credits: jentri.nelson
Jentri explained that her husband needs “his real hunting” just as much as she needs her ‘hunting.’
“He is also an attorney. He works hard to provide for our family. He does most of the cooking. He helps me keep the house clean, changes diapers, gives baths, kisses boo-boos, reads stories, and gives bottles. He loves me and our children more than anything. I would never want to deny him his passion of hunting when he is such a wonderful father and husband,” Jentri told us how much of a great human being Adam is.
The couple love and support each other unconditionally
Image credits: jentri.nelson
In Jentri’s opinion, relationships and marriage are about learning to compromise. She stressed just how important that really is. “Marriage is about give and take. You have to learn how to share both the responsibilities and the fun. Otherwise, it can lead to fights and bitterness. Give each other room to breathe.”
According to Jentri, Adam is a wonderful husband and father
Image credits: jentri.nelson
But how did the internet react to Jentri’s Facebook post about ‘hunting?’ “The internet reaction has been mostly positive. I have had many women tag their husbands and say things like ‘I’m going golfing’ and ‘I’m going to the gym.’ Many couples commented that they hadn’t thought of that type of compromise, which really made me happy. I’d like to think my post impacted some of those people in a significant way.”
However, there were some people who weren’t happy about the post, too. “There were some negative comments—mostly from people making assumptions. It is interesting that several people thought they were getting a full view of my marriage from one Facebook post, rather than the tiny glimpse that it really was.”
“Some people are upset that I don’t cook. Apparently, because I’m a woman, I need to get my bottom in the kitchen and whip up some pies. I can assure you that my husband is a fantastic cook, and he enjoys cooking. I would put his cooking against any woman I know, including my mother and mother-in-law (sorry mom and Stacey), and they are wonderful cooks.”
Compromise is incredibly important in relationships, according to Jentri
Image credits: jentri.nelson
There were even more misunderstandings! “For some reason, some people thought that I only get two nights alone per month. Others thought that my husband hunts for days and weeks at a time. I can assure you that I get alone time often. My husband hunts usually two days per week, and he rarely stays overnight away from home.”
“I honestly stopped reading the comments because some of them were so ugly,” Jentri noted. “The internet can be an ugly place. People are hiding behind keyboards and feel like they can say anything. I wish they would be more aware of the effect their words have on the writer. Above all else, I try to be kind.”
Most people on Facebook thought that Jentri was making a good point about couples
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